Updated: Feb 28, 2022
Ameena Chung, Meditation Guide at Cairo Meditation
I didn't know the word mindfulness itself before meditating.
Before meditating, I had a very low opinion of myself I truly hated myself.
I continually compared my shortcomings with others around me. I would constantly scrutinise myself, asking why I was only this much. Unknowingly putting myself under constant stress and hardship.
But after meditating, I realized how much I was simply doing this to myself. And I could see how much I lived in my mind world instead of the world as it is.
Before meditating, I didn't even know I had lived in my mind world, and I thought the world was unreasonable. I lived believing that I was ugly and unable to accomplish anything.I just hated and ignored myself, but when I looked back on my own life while meditating, I was able to observe my thoughts and realize what kind of mind pattern I have lived with. At the same time, I learned that I had always compared myself with others rather than accepting and loving myself as I am, falling into a sense of inferiority and only degrading myself.
And what I really liked about this method of meditation was that I could throw away these patterns within my mind. I was able to abandon all of those thoughts, not just knowing myself, but the main reason which caused inferiority. After abandoning those thoughts, I felt better and better, and I was able to accept and love myself as I am. And I was able to find out who I really am. Since finding my true self, anxiety and stress have been greatly reduced.
I could enlighten that my true self was in a state without such a negative mind. Thanks to that, I now get to know the true meaning of mindfulness. I really felt this method was great, and thanks to it, I was able to change my life. I am very grateful for this method.